When I was 11, my mom had twin boys. She had prayed for them, and God answered, “Yes.” Those twins are number 6 and 7 in our family of 9 kids where I’m the oldest. They just moved away from home this year for school. Of all my siblings, these two are the first to give me that “I’m getting old” feeling.
That’s because when the twins were born, and in the next couple of years, I grew up.
My mom homeschooled us and she always ran a ship-shape schedule. I love to get things accomplished. I love to learn. I love predictability. And comfort. Probably all from Mom.
Peter and John rocked that peaceful world. Routine vanished. Education fell to the wayside of feeding screaming babies and Mom and Dad keeping their own sanity. And I freaked a little bit. My brother Dave was in seventh heaven – no school! But for some unexplainable reason I needed to get back to school so I picked up my books and started teaching myself.
I started pitching in with more housework. Helping do more laundry – particularly cloth diapers…loads and loads of them. Dave and I both changed diapers for the first time and got paid a dime for a wet one, a quarter for a stinky one (guess who made more money?). At New Years Eve when Mom was too sick with the flu to make our annual gingerbread cookies, I dug out the cookbook and made them myself. I don’t think we decorated many, but I couldn’t’ let the tradition go.
Fast forward two years and Mom was expecting another baby. The twins were almost two. Mom was tired a lot (no duh!) and a lot more chores fell to me.
After long summer days that finished with me corralling the twins and giving them baths (no easy task!), I would go upstairs and write letters or write in my diary and cry my eyes out. I missed my friends and felt frustrated that so much was expected of me.
But that summer God drew near to me in the most precious way. He spoke to me through Matthew 11:28-29,
Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest for your souls.
God comforted me every night, “I’m with you. I’ll give you rest. You’re not alone. I see you. I love you. Thank you for serving me.”
I didn’t recognize it then, but God was laying foundation in my heart for a life of following him. He proved to me that he was real and that he loved me, strengthening me.
I love my brothers. I don’t think now that Mom was unfair. Sometimes life is just hard. But God is near to the heavy-hearted and the weary. So glad he was near to me.